When a woman looks for a car there is very little on her checklist. Aesthetically it has to look good, start every time, be fuel efficient, easy to park, have child proof locks, an air bag or two, a great color and really easy to maneuver. Stopping and starting have to be a pleasure. As for speed, the inner bits and all that other nonsense, women just don’t care about it. So you think you drive a hot car, do you? Here’s why women think your car’s ugly!
1. Mercedes Benz S Class
The first thought that jumps into a women’s head when she sees this car is that it’s a man’s car, always has been, always will be. It can have all the safety precautions, supposed sleek and elegant lines, air bags and alloy wheels it likes – but it’s still an ugly car. She won’t even take notice of the security system and child sensors, because to a woman, some posh idiot is in the driver’s seat. This car screams aged middle management, and that is not attractive.
2. Subaru Outback
Ever feel like you’ve joined the military? Well that’s what it feels like to drive a Subaru Outback if you’re a woman. Women don’t need bulging anything, let alone fenders. The details are unimportant and let’s face it, who cares what this man-tank can do off road? It isn’t fuel efficient, the dashboard is way too high and the trunk looks like another car is stapled to its rear. If a small women sits in the front she’ll be swallowed up by the seat. This is an ugly car.
3. Honda Legend
Isn’t it amazing that to a woman, a long Mercedes or an old Honda Legend has very little appeal. They even start looking like each other because their designers are mostly men. The big problem with this car is that it’s the traditional saloon shape that so puts women off. Compact, round and sleek is always best, so when a woman sees the 2005 Legend she thinks “ergh.” Just because the 2010 model is hot, doesn’t mean buying the older version is going to make you look cool, guys.
4. Chevrolet Lumina UTE
The Chevrolet Lumina UTE is just plain ugly. The only skirts a woman wants, are the ones you buy at a designer store or clothing shop. Have you ever tried going over speed bumps with those horrible low skirts, in five minutes they would have to be replaced. This is not the kind of car that’s practical, zippy or will make a woman’s life easier. These big engines are pointless, and ostentatious colors are not classic. The huge sound rigs that every Lumina driver has to install are also a constant irritation.
5. Hummer H3
The Hummer H3 may have some pretty great road handling abilities, but for a woman that’s like saying her horse has a new hairdo. Women don’t want rugged styling even if it makes the boys go crazy. It’s one of the ugliest cars ever made from a female perspective and follows in the footsteps of the hideous Jeep. These are unnatural designs for women, particularly in an urban area. The only possible use a woman would find for this Hummer is to smash other cars out of the way when she parks it.
6. Jaguar XJ6 (2008)
Jaguars have always appeared more like limousines to women, having extra length for no apparent reason. They take up invaluable road space and are a nightmare to park when you want to nip down to the mall. This car has no style – its long – that’s all. And the headlights look like the car is staring at you. It will take two hours to reverse out of your garage, and two hours to get back inside your garage. So altogether, you’ll be wasting 5 hours on reversing, parking, reversing and parking again.
7. Audi 6 Avant
The Audi 6 Avant looks more like a squashed minivan than a car, and although women like space for children and friends, the car shouldn’t look like a hearse no matter what color it comes in. Cars never used to be so big and spacious, which is great if you have eight children – but for normal families the looks outweigh the benefits. This is another ugly car that a self respecting woman wouldn’t even allow her husband to drive. With all the other great cars in its class, who wants an Audi 6 Avant?